Archive for June, 2014

More Than a Dress

Posted: June 30, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized

I love this. It is such a great snapshot of a D/s moment that had absolutely nothing to do with sex (well, not explicitly) or SM. Some of the very best moments in a D/s relationship happen outside fo the bedrooms and the dungeons. It’s these quite moments of love and intimacy and acceptance that really make it shine.
-Cross

Diary of a Married Woman

Since 1994, I’ve worn a dress 4 times – once for my own wedding and the other 3 times as a bridesmaid. I tolerated the wedding dress, but all others I hated. I hated the way they looked, the way they felt, the way I had to pay attention to how I sat and bent over. I was very overweight and self-conscious every second they were on my body. Dresses were not for me.

Friends of ours are getting married soon and it’s an upscale function and I needed something to wear. I thought I’d give dresses a try again. Yesterday, M took me dress shopping………and I can’t stop thinking about it.

At the store, I gathered up several dresses in my size and took them to the dressing room. M sat in the ‘man chair’ just outside the room, waiting. I slipped into the first one (that’s not true…

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Do you have a question for the Monday Mailbag, ask it here.

1. Rape Play / TPE / CNC

Can you please tell me the difference between Rape Play vs Total Power Exchange vs Consensual Non-Consent. And also, what do you think of these things? Are they ok?

(more…)

Advice for Novices: Red Folder

Posted: June 27, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Advice, Learn Something, Life Log

I have reached a point, now, where I can speak about sex and BDSM with even vanilla people without much reservation or embarrassment. But it wasn’t always that way.

When we first started out, my partner and I would often have trouble saying allowed the things that we fantasized about. That’s a problem, because it keeps you from getting the things you want. So we devised a way to communicate with each other. And in the years since, we have shared this idea with others who have also been able to use it to help their relationships.

So here it is, the Red Folder. (more…)

Denver, CO Area: TNG Party Next Thursday, July 3

Posted: June 24, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Events

TNG 7/3 Thursday Play Party

“ Happy Independence Day!” FETLIFE Event Posting Here

Date & Time:in 9 days Thursday, July 03, 2014 · 7:30 PM – 1:00 AM  
Location:
The Denver Sanctuary

Contact Love Slave at 720-443-3707 if you don’t already know where that is. 

Cost: $10.00 for door fee, $20.00 for membership fee
Dress code: We love to see your kinky wear, but it’s not required
Description:

Come hang out with the TNG (The Next Generation – ages 19-35) crowd to meet fellow kinksters, chat, and play at the Thursday TNG play party at Sanctuary!

The Thursday events do not have an educational presentation, but there will be orientation for those interested or those who are unable to attend the Tuesday TNG Events.

The doors for this party open at 730 PM. If you’ve NEVER been to the Sanctuary, bring $30. $10 for your door fee, $20 for your annual membership fee, and your government issued ID card. You will need to attend orientation. You only have to go through orientation on your first visit. Orientation starts at 8 PM and will only be given ONCE so it’s IMPORTANT TO BE ON TIME. If you are ages 19 or 20, the $20 membership fee is waived, and you only need $10 for your entrance fee.

If you’re already a Sanctuary member, make sure you bring your Sanctuary ID, government issued ID, and $10.00.

Escorted partners over the age of 36 are more than welcome to attend with you.

If you would like to bring any food items, please get a hold of cinimin and she will be happy to coordinate food stuffs with you.

If you need directions or have any questions please feel free to contact cinimin on FetLife, or call Christine at 720-443-3707.

Should XCBDSM just be about BDSM?

Posted: June 23, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized

So, we keep a folder of stuff we would like to write about, and tend to have a build up of stuff that isn’t strictly about BDSM, but rather about culture or society at large. These things certainly relate back to our community, but when we brainstorm the structure of what would actually be written, that connection would likely be minimal.

For instance, there is a big thing right now about NYC allowing women to walk around topless in public if they want to.  We think that is an awesome bit of progress for equal rights, and can also see connections to issues of rape culture and the general objectification of women and their bodies. We could write a lot about that.

And if forced, we could make that about BDSM somehow, but it wouldn’t feel natural.

So, since we’re getting a little more traffic than usual, now might be a good time to ask you all:

Should the topics on this website be restricted to things explicitly about BDSM? Would an occasional post about interesting things outside of kink upset anyone?

Here is a quick-click poll, but we would also LOVE to hear what you have to say about that in the comments.

Posted: June 23, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized

900 unique visitors to the website today. That’s a new record. And it’s only 3:30pm. I wonder if we can break 1,000 by midnight.

We’re up to 121 followers. Woohoo. Please be sure to share this post if you find it interesting or helpful.

Now, it’s Monday, so here are some quick answers to questions that I have received.

Or… In some cases, questions that someone asked in my general vicinity or somewhere on the internet. But I am answering them here, because that’s where I am.

The questions have been paraphrased or otherwise edited down to the essential details. (more…)