We have put up a new handout on how to put together your risk profile and play within your personal boundaries.
You can find the guide in the Educational Offerings > Handouts and Resources section up top or by clicking this link here.
We have put up a new handout on how to put together your risk profile and play within your personal boundaries.
You can find the guide in the Educational Offerings > Handouts and Resources section up top or by clicking this link here.
-*- Day 31 -*-
On October 4th, I gave up the reigns. For the first time in my adult life, I completely surrendered to another person.
In the month since then, My life has changed drastically, as you may imagine. Before now, the longest I had been in service continuously was a couple of weeks. I encountered some challenges, but I always knew that I would have my power, my control back soon. This time, that is not the case, and it has impacted my outlook and approach significantly. (more…)
This post will cover the theory behind “Defining and Refining Your Roles as a Submissive”
A note from the author: This has been getting a lot of extra traffic lately and some people have been misunderstanding the purpose. This information is pulled from the class that I teach on “Defining and Refining Your Role as a Submissive”. To understand the purpose for it, you really need to read Part 1 (linked above) and Part 3 (once it’s posted). If you have any questions, feel free to contact me at crossculturebdsm@gmail.com
Within the Leather/BDSM culture, there is a tradition that dates back to at least 1965. While it took different forms in different parts of the country, there has been some form of documentation found to support the existence of this tradition in almost every major city where a Leather sub-culture existed.
The tradition basically states that, with the exception of boots and belts, you are not permitted to wear leather unless it has been given to you by someone more experienced. The leather is usually given after you have “earned” it through some sort of milestone in your development, such as a particularly challenging scene or the mastery of a particular skill.
“I am not a Master because I say so, but because people older and wiser than me have said so” -Master Skip Chasey
Those words stuck with me. It was one of the first classes I ever attended on a BDSM topic. The title was “The Servant Master” and it was, and still is, one of the most influential and memorable events of my life.
It is nothing new, but recently my attention has been drawn to the ongoing frustration that many members of the community feel in regards to new (and usually young) individuals who choose to use the word “master” before their name. As I have participated in these discussions, I have done a lot of thinking on the matter and decided to go ahead and write about it.
Note: This article was published in the November 2010 edition of the NLA-C Link. All rights are reserved. Please do not repost without permission.
SSC vs RACK
A little history, a little opinion
By Cross
If you are truly in control, you never have to prove it.
You see so many dominants on a daily basis that feel that it is necessary and appropriate for them to “prove” how much control or power they have. In business, this is the person who fires someone every few weeks just to remind everyone that they can. In high school, it was the bully that randomly beat people up. In D/s, this is the person who does something humiliating and painful to their partner, not because the submissive deserves it, not because the dominant enjoys it, but simply to “prove” that they are in control. (more…)