Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Local Kink Vendor Fair ~ Denver ~ Sep 5

Posted: August 19, 2015 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized

Click the photo to go to the event information page

Did You Hear? Franklin Veaux wrote another book!

Posted: May 12, 2015 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized

Hey everybody! Hopefully most of you, by now, have read “More Than Two“, the incredibly insightful book by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert. If you haven’t, click on the book title in that last sentence, read my review, and then go buy yourself a copy. And THEN…

You can get super excited, as I am, about the upcoming release of his new book “The Game Changer: A Memoir of Disruptive Love” which is scheduled for public release on September 23, 2015 (You can pre-order the book by clicking on the link or the image below)


I just got my copy and I cannot wait to dive in. I will, of course, be writing a review here as soon as I am done reading it. For now, here is the official description:

Franklin and Celeste’s open marriage seemed perfectly safe—until the day Amber entered his life and showed them why the heart does not obey rules.

To make an open marriage work, Franklin and Celeste knew they needed to make sure no one else ever came between them. That meant there had to be rules. No overnights, no falling in love, and either one of them could ask the other to end an outside relationship if it became too much to deal with. It worked for nearly two decades—and their relentless focus on their own relationship let them turn a blind eye to the emotional wreckage they were leaving behind them.

The rules did not prepare them for Amber.“I have a question,” Amber would say. And whatever came next would send a wrecking ball through Franklin and Celeste’s comforting illusions. Amber was the first of Franklin’s polyamorous secondary partners to insist on being treated like a person, and the first to peel back the layers of insecurity and fear that surrounded their relationship. Amber was a game changer.

A game-changing relationship is one that uproots and redirects your life. It overthrows your assumptions about who you are and why. It awakens you to possibilities you’d never conceived of. It disrupts. And it is the unspoken elephant in the attractive showroom of polyamorous relationships.

This book is the true story of a game-changing relationship that changed not only Franklin and Celeste’s lives, but the face of the modern polyamory movement.

A game-changing relationship can happen to anyone. How will you handle it when it happens to you?

About the author:

Franklin Veaux is the co-author of “More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory” and the author of the top-ranked polyamory website He is also the creator of Onyx: The Game of Sexual Exploration and the co-founder of the Canadian high-tech sex toy company Tacit Pleasures. He has five partners and lives in Portland, Oregon, where he writes erotica and blogs about polyamory, BDSM, transhumanism, science and pseudoscience, and anything else that catches his attention.

Editor’s Note: We found this article to be well thought out, funny, and interesting. With permission from the author, we are sharing it here for all of you.

Lifted from:

I am a queer cisgender woman partnered with a queer transgender man. Because both my partner and I identified as queer before we met — and because I met him after he began his transition — we’ve never had to navigate the often tumultuous waters of being in love while one partner transitions.

Instead, we find ourselves often navigating the equally murky waters of fighting to be visiblein a culture that broadly perceives us as heterosexual. I’m aware that there are cis-trans couples where one or both partners identify as straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, or pansexual — that just isn’t us. It never has been, and it’s always been important to us both to be out and open. It’s our little form of personal activism.

But being the partner of someone who is part of a minority community that, at best, is enjoying some supposedly newfound “fascination” focus in the media has its own set of challenges. These are just a few of those challenges I’ve encountered, and heard reflected back from other women partnered with trans men: (more…)


I love this post. It’s great advice. For more awesome Poly tools, pick up the book “More Than Two” by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert

Sex Geek

– Raven Kaldera, “The Polyamory Contract”  


So I spent the bulk of this weekend in Ottawa, and one of the things I did there was teach a polyamory / non-monogamy workshop at Venus Envy. It was cool! Great turnout (22, woo-hoo!), thoughtful people, and a wide range of experiences – from total non-monog newbie to lifetime poly folk. Very interesting.

Normally when I teach, I really like to make things really interactive. But I’ve noticed that sometimes that’s not satisfying to people. For a lot of folks, when they show up to a workshop, they really want to come out of it with concrete, practical tools that will help them incorporate a new philosophy or practice into their lives. Now, telling people how to live their lives is kinda obnoxious, in my humble opinion, so I’m usually loath to approach a topic as though I have the monopoly on know-how. Especially when…

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XCBDSM and Colorado Leather Fest

Posted: February 18, 2015 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized


XCBDSM is proud to be a sponsor of Colorado Leather Fest. We will have XCBDSM staff at the event all weekend and will be announcing some very exciting news, so don’t miss it.

Event info can be found at, but here’s the basics.

Colorado Leather Fest is a three-day celebration of the Leather lifestyle. It will be held March 27-29 in Denver, Colorado at the Embassy Suites Denver Stapleton, 4444 N. Havana St, Denver 80239 (near I-70 and Havana). (more…)

Denver Tops Intensive ~ Feb 7

Posted: January 27, 2015 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized


An XCBDSM Full-Day Experience

After such a great reception (and capacity audience) at the first all-day intensive, we’ve decided to offer a second.

The first intensive, last October, was focused on relationship dynamics and ethical leadership as a dominant. This time around, we will be focusing more on play. But this is not a technical workshop on how to throw a flogger or tie a knot. Instead, we will be addressing the less tangible concepts around the responsibilities of a top and the methods for achieving the most fulfilling scenes possible. Details on the specific topics, including how to reserve your spot, can be found here. 

Preview: Playing Under The Influence

Posted: December 30, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Uncategorized

A Quick Preview of Tomorrow’s Article, which will go live at 9am MST tomorrow, New Years Eve.

“Don’t play intoxicated.”

There’s a three word sentence virtually guaranteed to start some heated arguments in a group of kinksters. For some, Playing high or tipsy is the antithesis of safe or sane, and is something to be avoided at all costs. It’s a huge no-no for many (a limit, even) and is viewed as very irresponsible. For others, it’s a way to augment a good time, something that might happen spontaneously or helps relax them and provides lubrication to higher states of being . They know their limits and are okay with the risk taking that goes with playing under the influence.

Personally, I lie in the middle-ish ground. I have played tipsy and high, both as a bottom and as a top. But I also think that playing under the influence can be extremely dangerous, and I hesitate to engage in that type of play often. I know a lot of readers are going postal that I might have topped while not fully in my head, or freaking because I’ve bottomed intoxicated. “But Jordyn, how the fuck do you know what you’re doing?? How can this and you possibly be safe??” Hold the judgments for a while- explore your discomfort with me, and let’s check in at the end again, okay?

Tune in tomorrow for the full article.