Archive for the ‘Life Log’ Category

Announcement – SF in Dec

Posted: July 29, 2014 by Isaac Cross in About Me, Events, Life Log
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Just confirmed, I will be visiting San Francisco, CA this December to teach a series of classes. Possibly at  multiple venues. I am most excited about a full-day intensive I will be presenting at the Citadel on the topic of “Effective and Affectionate Dominance”.

Any of you from that area can look for me from Dec 4-14. I plan to attend a ton of events while I am in town, from munches to parties. If you know of anything going on that week, be sure to let me know. I would also love the chance to meet up local folks for lunch or to do something that an out-of-town person like me might not think to do. Send me an email! (Cross@xcbdsm.com)

I will have a more detailed and descriptive announcement when all the details are finalized, but for now, I just wanted to give everyone out there a heads up that I am on my way!

Yet Another Affirming/Transforming Thunder

Posted: July 14, 2014 by Isaac Cross in About Me, Events, Life Log
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Thunder in the Mountains has this really unique way of simultaneously reassuring me that I am on the right path while also altering that path in significant ways. It’s a really weird phenomenon that I have never been able to figure out.

Usually, I have gone into Thunder with control over my play. There is at least one person who, generally speaking, is at my command and who I can do things to when I want to. This time, with both of my partners indisposed, I found myself with a completely open dance card for the first time ever at a convention. I filled one spot about two weeks in advance, planning a piercing scene for Saturday evening, and had a couple more on the fly Friday evening. Oddly enough, I think the relaxed nature of those scenes and the fact that little, if anything, was planned in advance really helped to make them all better. There have been times in the past where scenes set up ahead of time ended up with a lot of pressure on them to be awesome, which made it even worse when some of them had to be called off part way through. (more…)

Advice for Novices: Red Folder

Posted: June 27, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Advice, Learn Something, Life Log
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I have reached a point, now, where I can speak about sex and BDSM with even vanilla people without much reservation or embarrassment. But it wasn’t always that way.

When we first started out, my partner and I would often have trouble saying allowed the things that we fantasized about. That’s a problem, because it keeps you from getting the things you want. So we devised a way to communicate with each other. And in the years since, we have shared this idea with others who have also been able to use it to help their relationships.

So here it is, the Red Folder. (more…)

Follow Me Everywhere

Posted: June 1, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Life Log
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Welcome to XCBDSM.COM

There is a bunch of stuff on here, but before you go exploring, be sure to take this chance to follow us all over the internet. There will be things that only get posted to one or two platforms, so following me everywhere gives you the best chance of seeing everything.

Facebook

Twitter

Tumblr

Reddit

Fetlife

Goodreads

See you there!

A Couple of Site Upgrades

Posted: May 31, 2014 by Isaac Cross in Life Log
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First of all, I have saved everyone’s fingers a little bit of effort buy purchasing the domain “XCBDSM.com” for this site. The old address “CrossCultureBDSM.com” will still work for the next year, at least.

I also set up an email address to go with it: Cross@XCBDSM.com which is also considerably shorter than the old one, “crossculturebdsm@gmail.com”, which will also continue to function.

There is also some boring background stuff that none of you will notice. But those are the big ones.

Thanks for the continued support.

My First Time in a Dungeon: The Merits of Not Censoring Scenes

Posted: May 12, 2014 by Isaac Cross in About Me, Learn Something, Life Log, Philosophy
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I first held a knife to a girl’s throat in a sexual/BDSM context in 2001. I was 16 and I cut myself pretty bad during that experience. This would not be the last time I cut myself during knife play, but I have never drawn blood from a partner unless I meant to.

A few years later, in spring of 2005, I started playing with the girl who is now my wife. We were 19 at the time.

We were not allowed into play parties, our local convention, or most other other types of events in the area. Because everything was 21+. This meant that we took most of our cues and early BDSM ideas from internet porn (which, it turns out, is not a reliable source of accurate information about responsible play). There were mistakes, some of them resulting in injury.

When I was finally turned 21, in 2006, it was a mere few weeks before Thunder In The Mountains (TITM).

Now, if you have never been to TITM, I will simply describe it this way: Hundreds of people, sometimes as many as a thousand, the largest dungeon you will probably ever see (at nearly 50,000 square feet) and some of the most famous or notorious names in Kink from around the world. (more…)

One Month

Posted: November 5, 2013 by Isaac Cross in About Me, Featured Posts, Life Log
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,
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-*- Day 31 -*-

On October 4th, I gave up the reigns. For the first time in my adult life, I completely surrendered to another person.

In the month since then, My life has changed drastically, as you may imagine. Before now, the longest I had been in service continuously was a couple of weeks. I encountered some challenges, but I always knew that I would have my power, my control back soon. This time, that is not the case, and it has impacted my outlook and approach significantly. (more…)

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