XCBDSM is a proud sponsor of The Colorado Center for Alternative Lifestyles (CAL).
CAL is committed to creating an environment in our state that supports consenting adults who engage in alternative relationship expressions and structures.
We pursue our vision through direct services, education, and outreach, in conjunction with our partners, to directly benefit individuals who choose alternative lifestyles and the communities that support them.
And finally... Our favorite sex toy brand: TANTUS
Below are a couple books that I have found useful and interesting.
For a full list of recommended reading, visit my Bookshelf Page.
Clicking on the images will take you to the Amazon product page.
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This book did so much more just add words to my existing knowledge and experience, as I had expected. This book taught me things. This book changed the way that I think about relationships. All relationships, not just poly. I have spent the last two days lost in thought, re-evaluating a lot of my own choices and beliefs. And that’s good. That’s what a great book like this should do.
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Combines Miss Abernathy’s Concise Slave Training Manual and Training With Miss Abernathy in one deluxe volume.
Replete with updated resources and references, Erotic Slavehood will take its place among the basic BDSM reference manuals.
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Respected columnist and scene leader Rinella has carefully explored how BDSM relationships fit into real people's lives.
From that research, and his own two decades as an active leatherman, he has assembled this sensible, readable manual about how kinky relationships really work.
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This has been my biggest year yet for teaching. And I just found out that I have been chosen to present at Beyond Leather 5 next April in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida.
This is easily the largest event that I have had the chance to teach at, and I look forward to it.
I will also be spending a week and a half in the DC area doing a series of workshops at several locations, including the Winter Solstice conference in New Jersey.
I’ll have more details on these trips soon.
I wanted to write about this primarily because it is something that I have faced, myself. While I identify as a switch, my actual experiences, especially in public, have been 95-99% as a dominant/top. As a result, this is how people think of me most of the time. So on the rare occasion that I have the opportunity to serve someone I trust in public, I find that people react oddly to it. For a week or two after such an event, people speak to me differently or not at all, seemingly because their image of me has been disrupted or distorted. (more…)
Within the Leather/BDSM culture, there is a tradition that dates back to at least 1965. While it took different forms in different parts of the country, there has been some form of documentation found to support the existence of this tradition in almost every major city where a Leather sub-culture existed.
The tradition basically states that, with the exception of boots and belts, you are not permitted to wear leather unless it has been given to you by someone more experienced. The leather is usually given after you have “earned” it through some sort of milestone in your development, such as a particularly challenging scene or the mastery of a particular skill.
UPDATE 7/26/10: In response to questions I have been receiving: The needle was removed from the sterile packaging immediately before the piercing, manipulated using medical tools, and inserted into skin that had been cleansed. I took all appropriate precautions to ensure that the procedure was safe to my standards. But let’s be clear. No piercing is 100% safe, no matter what lengths you go to. There will always be risk of infection, scarring, nerve damage, pain, bleeding, and bruising. Everyone must determine their own Risk Profile. This scene was within acceptable levels of risk for both myself and my bottom.
We now return you to our regularly scheduled post </update>:
Wow, I had some fun last night. I’ve been itching to try something since Thunder a couple weeks ago.
I saw a presentation on “Needles for Bondage” by Tony Buff and Derek Desilva. http://www.tonybuff.com
One of the techniques he presented was bending the needle to create a fishhook shape. It gave me an idea, which I shared with them later that day, to use a similar technique to create a corkscrew shape.
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